Golf Truisms and Christmas Shopping...

Posted Dec 23 2009, 08:08 AM by Cathy Erickson
I know the holidays are a time for joy and laughter, but if you're like me and still making that mad scramble (pun intended) to finish your Christmas shopping, the "good cheer" thing is a little harder to come by.  But when you put it golf perspective, at least I can smile a little more.
 
Keep up with the pace of play.
 
Where was a ranger when I needed him???  Before I had even hit my first store after work yesterday my frustration level had hit its peak.  If we had been on the golf course, the guy in the maroon Subaru Forrester would have probably been hit into.  He was one of those guys who felt the need to drive 20 in a 30mph and took FOREVER to get going when the car in front of him started moving.  When we missed the first stoplight I yelled and threw my hands in the air (you know this move, don't you?).  Uh oh, this is not starting out well.

I love seeing new golfers on the course...just not in front of me.
 
Please, people.  If you are not in panic mode like the rest of us and just out "window shopping" or checking out the sales, stay home.  I'm begging you...we're stressed out enough as it is, and if you're not in speed mode it messes it up for the rest of us!
 
Let faster players go through.
 
Ever had the experience where the course is hardly full and you and a friend are zipping around and you run into a 4-some of guys who think they own the course?  You get to the next tee while they are still teeing off and they give you "the look" and drive off.  You know "the look"...it's the "I paid to be out here, too, so you're going to have to wait" look...it doesn't matter that we're the only 6 people on the golf course.  I've got a couple gift cards in my hand and the lady in front of me has a cart full of whatever.  She looks at me, then my hand, and unloads her cart without looking at me again.
 
You always seem to find everyone else's ball but yours.
 
All I wanted was a little kitchen toy set for my nieces.  8,000 little work benches but no kitchen sets.  Grrr.
 
I need a ruling.
 
Where are the rules officials when you need ask a question?  I must have spent 10 minutes in the first store just looking for someone to help me...and of course when I finally found someone they had to go find someone else.  Sigh.
 
You only get 5 minutes to look for a lost ball.
 
I incorporated this rule after store one.  If I couldn't find what I was looking for and couldn't find someone to help me in 5 minutes I moved on to the next store.  (this is why I ended up with several gift cards)
 
Follow the cart signs.
 
I finally get to second in line in the left turn lane and I'm seeing my freedom.  We get the green arrow and the car in front of me is not moving.  I wait.  Nothing.  I inch up.  She doesn't move.  And then I did something I never do...I honked at her...I thought maybe, just maybe, she was on a cell phone or singing Christmas music and wasn't paying attention to the light.  Still nothing.  The arrow goes away and the mass of cars from the opposite direction start moving and then she pulls out straight ahead...she was in the wrong lane.  And I missed the light.
 
You are not going to squeeze your ball through that opening in the trees.
 
But of course some guy had to squeeze into a spot right next to me with his Suburban so that I couldn't get my door open!!
 
Always tip the beverage cart girl.
 
The "bagging groceries for tips" is neat fundraiser... and any time saved is worth a few dollars!
 
Be sure to put your clubs back in the same spot in your bag.
 
My credit card got quite the workout, and when I'm in panic mode I usually try to put it in my front pocket so I can make my transaction as speedy as possible.  But at store 3 I threw it in my purse with the receipt.  Fast forward to store 4 and I can't find the credit card.  My mind flashes back to the last store (sort of like going back and counting your strokes on the green) and thankfully I remember that I put it in the front pocket.  Lost the time I had made up at the grocery store!
 
Fix your divots.
 
It only takes a few seconds to bring your shopping cart to the designated spot, so please, don't leave it in the empty spot next to you so no one can park there.  There is nothing worse than thinking you have found a parking gold mine...only to have to pull back out because of that darn cart!  And any good golfer would take care of another divot, too, so I went and moved the cart even though I had to park somewhere else.
 
Every once in awhile you get a members bounce.
 
Just when I had about given up on finding a gift, I went down the wrong aisle by accident and found exactly what I was looking for!  YAY!  THANK YOU to whoever it was that put it in the wrong spot.
 
It was a tough round yesterday, but I made it!  And the best thing about golfers who love the game is that no matter how bad a round might be you're already looking forward to the next time you get to play.
 
I wish I could say that I was all set now, but I'm in panic mode for one more day.  I've got the shopping lists ready, and I've got a few back up plans just in case...hopefully I won't have to lay up!
 
I wish Christmas shopping really WAS like golfing!
 
I hope you all have a happy and joyous holiday...Merry Christmas!!

Filed under: Golf, Cathy Erickson, Christmas, shopping